In order for you to do again to stare your own past, past - to presently the diary is written.


Slow, you think that it becomes, but we would like to persevere, is.
No.1 by Natsu (♀KM94JA) 08/03/609: 04
I was born in the day when the ending of Bai-u close sunlight is strong.

In the origin of the parent where the year is young still.

The life which was desired?? When with it is questioned

“You do not understand”
It seems…


Also the person who does not desire my birth stayed, because it seems.


As for that person grandparents of mothers.

Because money help from the mother is gone, you say that my birth applied increase uninformed.


It is born simply and I of building think that love of the person of the parent and Sawayama was requested.
No.2 by Natsu (♀KM94JA) 08/03/609: 08
To 1 years old you had lived in countryside town of Ibaraki prefecture.

As for living it was not affluent, but whether being 1st calm everyday life….


You moved in the birthday of my 1 years old and you say that also living little by little became easy.


The tip of moving was the apartment, but is, the memory here is not excessively good ones.
No.3 by Natsu (♀KM94JA) 08/03/609: 13
The mother calls that training.

As for having love you think that it is certain, therefore and, the eldest daughter, in the human who will be been secure, and the mother it is young….

It probably is connected to [ikisuki] ゙ [ta] training.


At each time you can scold from the time where matter and mind is attached it reached the point where it is beaten extremely.

And it is deposited to the degree which goes to the pachinko to the place of the grandparents who the better [ku] think me uninformed in the degree where stress of the mother accumulates.
No.4 by Natsu (♀KM94JA) 08/03/609: 20
[ikisuki] ゙ [ta] training of the mother hits the back with the futon hitting.

In threshold several hours sitting straight.

Leaving to park of night.

Violence of word.

When and so on it lifts, there is no drill.


Even among them 1st as for being harsh with violence of word, from young time
“Your something you bear, it is it was not”

“The mother we would like to stop”

“The gold [ku] it is, the insect”


Mother…However there was also a pleasant thing, all the way there was also a harsh thing.

Even then you were loved.
Making the body small in the degree which you can scold, killing voice, it cried, don't you think?.
As for that…Therefore mother dislike my tearful voice…
No.5 by Natsu (♀KM94JA) 08/03/609: 31
I the time where the soldier/finishing garden it does the preschool as for the mother giving applied the younger sister.
It was the birth where the younger sister desired to everyone different from me and waited in waiting.


In me also the cool grandparents ran in the hospital and the extent which is attached rejoiced.


Being the soldier/finishing garden close, it cannot have me of the time attending the mother, it is lonesome, it had hidden.

As for my mother in order to dislike the fact that opinion is said what say your own feeling was not permitted, only followed the mother with anytime.
Even presently as for me almost it cannot say your own feeling to others.
No.6 by Natsu (♀KM94JA) 08/03/609: 36
The younger sister who becomes the elementary school student and loves.


Only being scolded, me.
With it reached the point where you say.


If the younger sister cries, scolding.
If goes to play with the friend the younger sister wishes to go, it keeps accompanying.


Naturally, it did not keep accompanying the child which still is close to the baby as for the [te] because it does not become as for the friend leaving with the nature it kept.

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